A Love Letter

Posted: Wednesday, July 6, 2011 in Uncategorized

Dear Township,

Thank you for your stellar road maintenance. Since early June, I have had only 3 flat tires either while driving on or immediately after driving on your very recently graded roads.

I would also like to commend you on your ability to fix but not really fix a road.  You know the one I’m talking about. But if your not sure let me refresh your memory.

When I moved up here in 2005, R Road was riddled with potholes and the 90 degree curve was only big enough for one car. unless the second car wanted to drive over a 12 inch drop off into the very sharp rocks. Year after year it got worse.  I used to joke that you were waiting for it to turn back to dirt.

Well the joke was on me and it was good one guys.

Last year you regraded the road and took up what little ashphalt was left and packed some loose stone to the blind curve to add an extra 3 inches on one side.

LOLZ.

Fast forward to this year and our brand new road crew. We had a lot of rain and a couple of roads washed out, either in part or whole. R road (the one that used to be paved) was partially washed away on either side leaving almost enough room for one vehicle up most of the road.

You guys were on it like stink on shit. Within a couple weeks, You had kinda smoothed it out leaving only shallow ditches filled with large sharp boulders.

How do I know they’re sharp? Just ask my right rear tire. Some people enjoy playing “chicken” with larger vehicles who are already in the narrowest part.

I do not but that just seems to be me.

Do you know what I do enjoy? How you just can’t seem to get out of my fast enough when I unknowingly roll up on your work.

Seriously.

I’m just tooting along on your handiwork when, BAM! Out of nowhere, there you guys are. And rather than make me wait an extra minute or so to let you get completely out of the road, you wave me over a giant pile of sharp rocks.

Just ask my left rear tire about that one.

And now, thanks to your hard work, those same sharp rocks are spread all over the road.

Just ask my left front tire and my three kids who had to sit in a hot truck with no a/c while I changed my tire.

Thanks for all your hard work and effort to keep our dusty dirt roads functioning.

Love ,

Me and She Who Must Not Be Named

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Comments
  1. Kelley says:

    I don’t know how you do it!! I would fall off the road the first time I tried, I’m sure. That is so scary, though, that they don’t fix the roads right. Be careful!!!!!!! Maybe get a plane??

    • Sarah says:

      Winter is even worse. The school bus won’t even come up my road anymore because 2 years in a row it was a sheet of ice for weeks on end. I really wish I could have a plane or a helicopter. There’s plenty of room to land it up here.
      A tank would work well too.

  2. Cara says:

    You changed your own tire with three kids in the car. That is rad. In my parts, I’m all about the Triple A.

    • Sarah says:

      I told Tom that if a AAA membership showed up in my stocking, it would be The. Best. Present. EVA! Better than the hot pink pumps I have on my Amazon wishlist twice. I wonder if he got the hint.

  3. Oh, frackity frack frack. You changed a tire? The last time I did that, I was only pretending so the hot guy in the car parked next to mine would get out and do it for me so I could get his number.

    But, um, I didn’t like CALL him or anything. Or date him for 5 months.

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