As we live our lives, we all move toward the same point. The one great equalizer.
Some die old, some die young and some somewhere in the middle. But one plain and simple point is, when you gotta go, you gotta go.
Yesterday, around 4 pm, My grandmother made it halfway to the final destination. She had a stroke and is now in a coma. The prognosis is not good.
I remember going to the Thruway with her as a kid. She would meet a friend for coffee and they would pass a small bottle under the table to pour into their Styrofoam cups. She would put her finger to her lips, indicating that I should keep it a secret. I had no idea why I should but I did anyway.
She had a tiny little baseball bat in her car. According to her, it was for beating up bad guys. At that moment, to me, she was a super hero. Because to me, as a little kid, only super heroes beat up bad guys.
My most powerful and fondest memories of her took place in her kitchen.
I can see her now, singing to her “Grandma Music” (big band, 40’s type stuff), rolling out pie crust or cinnamon rolls on her kitchen table. Or putting waffles in the toaster for us or serving my grandfather coffee from her percolator.
Grandma had often to urged me to go back to school. She was always telling me that I was to smart not too. We’ll see what the future hold in that department.
She also kept asking when Tom and I were going to make it legal and have a real wedding. While I understand where she was coming from, I stand by my belief that a wedding doesn’t make a marriage. Love, trust and a commitment (legally binding or not) from both people makes a marriage. I think she understood because she stopped asking after I told her how I felt. At the very least she respected my feelings.
She also asked me cyber stalk my cousin a few times a year. Just to check up on her and her mom and sister. I obliged every time. It was her wish that my cousin and I would reconnect.
Wish granted, Grandma.
It may have taken your soul leaving this earth and I may have made an ass out of myself on the phone ( I hate phones) but you got your wish.
While my grandma was not without her faults, I loved her and cared about her.
I will miss her.
May you fly with golden wings, dance on light feet, sing with the angels and openly drink spiked coffee.