Archive for the ‘potty training’ Category


Posted: Thursday, June 3, 2010 in depressed, for sale, Freedom, hope, kids, potty training, work

I was out solo today. I had a quick job interview and decided to pop into an antique shop in town. I wandered around and enjoyed  the silence in my head. I had no intentions of buying anything. I really didn’t have the money to spare. Even the 1948 Fleischmanns Yeast bread book for $2.

I was the perfect companion to my 1943 version of the book and it killed me to walk away. I love old books. They’re so delicate to the touch and their smell reminds me of something I can’t quite name. The paper is soft and fuzzy like the footsie jammies my kids wear in the winter.

I was checking out a book, mostly just to have it in my hands, when I flipped the back cover open to find a religious leaflet. I’m not into religion, it’s just not my thing. I really didn’t give it much thought as I flipped the leaflet over to see what was on the front.

I shut the book quickly, but the pieces were already locked into place. I may not be religious but I do believe in a higher power or an unseen force. It was like that force was telling me that it will all work out. All the  stress and tears today would be worth it.
 Hope is  one of the hardest things to lose. I was loosing it today. Everything was slipping away in just a few hours. No matter what I did, hope just kept getting further away. Despite my concerted effort to change my circumstances, I felt deeper in shit than the day before. 
Until those words, I was on a slippery slope that could have taken me months to climb out of. I still have to deal with some pretty crappy stuff like selling whatever I can live without. I still have to figure out daycare so I can work in September. I still have to deal everyday.
But there is hope. In the words of my 7th grade history teacher-

” There is a light at the end of the tunnel, Sarah. And it’s NOT a God damned train!” 

P.S.- I bought the book and the one on top of it.


Amanda is potty trained. It took a long time to get there. She had a hard time with the whole poop in the potty thing. For months she would flat out refuse, scream and cry  and then have tummy troubles. Eventually she got over it. Sort of.

About once every two weeks we go through the whole ” I have a boo boo in my belly but I won’t go potty” deal. Tonight was shaping up to be one of those nights. While I was busy being the human jungle gym, I noticed a smell that could only come from Amanda’s tush. I naturally ask if she had to go potty to which the answer was a hesitant no. We’ve been down this road a few times already so I know better. I sent her off to the bathroom anyway.

After a few minutes I went to make sure she wasn’t washing her hands in the potty again. I found my poor baby sitting quietly near tears. I hunkered down on the side of the tub and got ready to talk her through another round on the potty.

Amanda- I got boo boo

Me- It won’t hurt if you let the poopy out every day.

Amanda- It go home?

Me- Huh?

Amanda- Poopy go home?

Me- Uhhh… Yeah, Sure! ….Where?

Amanda– In da potty. ( duh mom)

 The child just handed me a ball and my mom brain is screaming at the rest of me to run like Hell with it.

Me- That’s right, baby. You’ve got to let the poopy go home in the potty every day.

Amanda- It go home and see it mommy. It mommy in da potty.

At this point I’m speechless and so is she. I’m in shock and she’s taking care of business. When she’s finished, she jumps up with a big yay, waves bye to her deposit and flushes it home to it’s mommy.

I know this may seem like a silly or even gross thing to talk about but it was big to me. Less than a year ago this would not have been possible. Less than a year ago Amanda barely talked. She had less than 30 words at 2 and a half and didn’t talk in sentences.

Because of this she has been in a special education preschool class since her 3rd birthday. Special education means that I have to have a meeting with her teacher to discuss her IEP (Individualized Education Program) for the next year. I had that meeting with Amanda’s teacher the other day and heard some pretty amazing words from her.

 Try to get Amanda into Headstart next year because this stuff is way to easy for her now.
Mommy guilt was magically lifted and a huge sigh of relief went through me. My little girl is gonna be okay in the smarts department. Not only can she carry an imaginative conversation but she can poop in the potty. At the same time!